Tell me if this sounds familiar. Saturday morning, sometime during the summer of 1970:
Me:
“Hey Dad… I’m heading over to Ken’s house.”
Dad:
“OK. What are you two gonna do today?”
Me:
“I dunno… maybe go grab some fries and shakes at Randy’s Burgers. Ride around.”
Dad: “OK… just be sure to get home before dark.
and stay outta trouble.”
Me:
(whooshing sound as I blast off into the Great Unknown)
I
would jump on my metallic purple 10-speed and haul-ass from home as fast as my
pedaling could take me. Yes, I would
make my way to Ken’s house for a few minutos, maybe even find some time to make
out with his sister Julie (if no one saw us), but that was only the start of a
typical teen-age Saturday morning. The
possibilities were endless, and my hard-earned allowance of $3 a week (handed
over to me just before I left) guaranteed that I would not go hungry or
thirsty, no matter what adventures came our way.
We
might ride up to the top of Pee Hill and tempt injury or death by racing down
the steep streets like imbeciles. We
might ride to the (outdoor old-skool) mall in West Covina to look for girls or
ride The Broadway elevator up and down 14 times before getting kicked out by
the ancient security guard. We might
ride up into La Habra Heights and careen down the steep and twisty tree-lined
streets while the neighborhood dogs would race after us to try and bite our legs and tires. We might ride to Workman High
School to watch the cute cheerleaders bouncing and prancing around during field
practice. We might even ride the 35 miles all
the way to Huntington Beach to hang out on the sand and eat hot dogs and just
be stupid hormone-soaked teenage Cali boys.
We
might wind up doing some or all of those things. Or not.
The point is, once I left the house, I was GONE, baby... totally lost. The only way Dad would know where I was and
what I’d been up to was if I got hurt or in trouble. Otherwise, he didn’t have a clue where I was,
who I was with, or what I/we were doing.
There were phone booths all over town if I had to make a call for any
reason, but I had no reason to call unless I was hurt or in trouble, see? He trusted me enough to let me roam about
unhindered, unsupervised, uncontrolled.
That’s how it was for a relatively-good 13-year-old boy in 1970 in La
Puente, California. I know it wasn’t the
same for girls… or was it?
I
WAS FREE.
No
smart phone. No mobile phone at
all. No tablet. No pager. No e-tracking. No live feeds. No GPS.
No electronic tethers of any kind to worry about.
I
WAS FREE.
No
closed-circuit cameras were mounted on buildings, ready to catch me doing
brodies on the smooth concrete loading dock at Food Giant. No motion sensors were activated when we
climbed into dumpsters behind the liquor store, looking for ruined copies of
PLAYBOY or STAG Magazines. Active
surveillance was limited to being seen and/or heard doing… whatever.
I
WAS FREE.
I
feel awful for 13-year-old kids in our modern climate change age, with their
(not very) smart phones and Fecesbook updates and Twatter feeds and I(B)Ms and
all the things that hold them in electronic hostage, whether they are conscious
of their condition or not. Yeah, they
might think they have it all… all the electronic goodies and the
interconnectivity we modern humans think we cannot live without. But they are NOT FREE, no way no how. They can NEVER be as free as I was in 1970,
riding my bike (without a helmet) across town, hair flying and sweat streaming
and skinny tires glued to the ground by
gravity alone.
I’d
been thinking about this issue for some time when I read a column in my local
paper, written by a school teacher who answers questions posed by unbelievably
dense parents. Seems a Mother’s
kindergarten-aged daughter was having trouble making friends at school or her pre-scheduled ‘play dates’ and Mom asked what should
she do. The teacher’s answer was
surprising… she basically said that play dates usually don’t work out for kids,
because it’s really about the parents being friends and getting together.
As for the kid making friends in her
neighborhood (which the Mom doesn’t allow), the teacher talked about her own Mom
letting her leave the house ON HER OWN and walk up the street to make friends,
something ‘play dates’ just don’t accommodate.
Kids that don’t learn to make friends unless there is direct adult
supervision are just missing out, so Mom needs to take kid to the park and let
her run wild, make her own friends and learn how to assimilate into her own age
group… on her own. Skip the play dates,
lessen the hovering and supervision and little Missy’s ability to make friends
at school would probably improve dramatically.
I
read the question and answer over a few times to make sure I understood what
was being discussed, and that’s when I flashed back to my yoot. Even as a little kid, I somehow managed to
find other kids my own age, whether at school or in the ‘hood, to play with and
fight with and get into trouble with, to the betterment of us all. Even then, the only time the parents got
involved was when we drew blood or needed stitches or to be fed so we could
rumble again.
It
all relates to my original concern about too much electronic connectivity,
parental control, covert and overt supervision.
When you grow up with those things as part of your world, you never know
what it means to be without them, and therefore never learn to operate without
them or know what it means to be so unencumbered. This meme is probably not unlike arguments
made about landline phones or teevee or any other modern conveniences that
changed our lives during the last 100 years, arguments made by olds to youngs,
the same arguments that are met with a heavy sigh and rolling eyeballs. I think the newest digital demons are much
more sinister, far more mind-numbing and ADD-causing, and are creating people who never really
know what it means to be free, the way I was at 13 years old.
As I've asserted before, I
reject the ownership of a smart phone, and will do so unless and until it
becomes mandatory for my work. I make no
excuses for this Luddite tendency, even though my current work phone allows me
to text and take pictures. I understand
how smart phones have become ubiquitous, their presence almost natural in many people’s
lives. However, I draw the line at owning one for a wide variety of reasons. Example: my boss recently called me into his office
and we had the following conversation:
Him:
“Here, I have a new phone for you to replace your old one, it’s a smart phone I
just got.”
Me: “Thanks, but I don’t need a smart phone.”
Him:
“Whaddaya mean, you don’t need a smart phone?
It’s new and lets you browse the web!”
Me: “I have a philosophical issue with smart
phones and choose not to have one. The phone I have lets me text when I need to and that’s
enough for me.”
Him:
(sounding slightly confused) “But… you can check your e-mail from your smart
phone no matter where you’re at.”
Me: “I can check my
e-mail when I'm working at my desk. If I’m out and about, that means
I’m busy doing something else and my e-mail can wait until I get back to my
desk.”
Him: (with a look of confusion and incredulity on
his face, pauses for a few beats) “Well… OK then. Have it your way.”
I
know he didn’t understand my point, but then again his Droid calls out to him
all day long, pulling his eyes out of his head in an instant. For him, not having a smart phone is just…
DUMB. Every time I mention my aversion
to smart phones, I get the same reaction, with varying degrees of flabbergast
and disbelief. I’m used to it, but it
gets annoying. I know it’s a losing
battle… even my personal phone carrier is dropping their 2G service soon, which
will render my ancient Nokia obsolete, forcing me to get a newer, more
connected device. I’m not looking
forward to it.
Back
to that whole teenage freedom thingie. It only
went so far (as it should), and my 13-year-old self sure as hell knew it. In the case of being gone on my bike all day,
there was one hard and fast Dad rule: I had BETTER be in the front yard by the time
the street lights came on or it was the belt for me, no questions asked, no
excuses. And he whipped HARD. That was all the motivation I needed to keep me in line, the
vision of him hanging on to my arm with one hand, his belt lashing at me with the
other, both of us circling around in a weird dance of parental discipline. Me no likey!
So
here’s how it happened (more than once heh heh heh): me and Ken are at Randy’s Burgers, eating
fries and drinking choco shakes and trying to act all cool in front of some
girls from another school. Suddenly, I
stopped cold… I realized it was getting dark and I was at least 2 miles from
home. HOLY SHIT!!! I dropped my food and
jumped on my bike and blasted off for home, riding like a deranged rabid
wolverine through the quickly-darkening neighborhoods, pedaling my ass off. Somewhere about halfway home, my skinny front
tire caught one of the recessed gutters at an intersection and I went down
HARD, rolling into the curb and scrubbing flesh off my hands and arms.
Without
missing a beat, I jumped back on my bike and careened around corners, narrowly
missing cars and curbs and pedestrians, riding like mad to get home please
please PLEASE let me get home in time!!!!!
Rounding the curve near my home, I almost go down again, somehow
managing to stay upright, slicing onto the sidewalk and crashing onto the grass
in front of my house. I jump up and see
the street lights flickering on, then spin around to see Dad, standing in the
front doorway, a stoic look on his face, saying nothing. Her didn’t need to. He slowly turns around and goes into the
house, closing the door behind him.
I
made it, but just barely.
I
don’t begrudge the use of smart phones per se, but I do worry about the
subliminal effects the electronic leash will have on the young’uns. I am totally OK with how this technology has
asserted itself into our daily lives, as all modern conveniences tend to
do. However, I can choose which of these
tools to use, which ones to avoid, and which ones to rail against with vigor
and contempt. You know, just like Abe
Simpson yelling at clouds… it will have the same impact.
For
the time being, I’ll just keep using whatever mobile device(s) that allow me to
have the least amount of connectivity possible and avoid the inevitable
encroachment of streaming mega-data into my conscious sphere. And I will continue to value that time in my
life when I was pedaling around La Puente on a Saturday with my
friend Ken, untethered, completely unattached from any web of any kind, thinking only of
being on my own and away from home, eating fries and dodging cars, making out with Julie and getting totally and completely lost.
Epilogue:
Ken was one of my best friends all through
Junior and High School, and we spent lots of idle days cruising around town on our 10-speeds. He was the first among my circle of friends
that got his driver’s license and a car in 1972, and we managed to get into all sorts
of bitchin’ situations in that faded blue beast.
I had sporadic contact with him after we left high school, and the last
time I saw him was in 1990 when he stopped in to visit The Artist and me at our
home in Long Beach. I always wanted to
reconnect with him again, but I found out just last year that both he and his sister
had died under sad and unfortunate circumstances.
I was really depressed when I realized I could
not and would not ever see him again, but that depression has passed and now
I will always have him in my head and my heart. Sometimes I can almost hear him, calling my name and softly knocking on
my bedroom window at 4AM on Saturday morning, ready to begin our 3-hour ride to
the beach, climbing through La Habra Heights in the cool dark, careening down
the other side and pedaling all the way down Beach Boulevard until we reached
the sand and the ocean and the sweet escape it offered.
Thanks, Ken… we did it on the good foot, unconnected, lost in La Puente.
Lead image, gracias de flickr.com; Jimi Hendrix 'Freedom' and Bread 'Mother Freedom' videos, muchismas gracias de youtube.com; R.I.P. Ken & Julie Wallis.
Thanks, Ken… we did it on the good foot, unconnected, lost in La Puente.
Lead image, gracias de flickr.com; Jimi Hendrix 'Freedom' and Bread 'Mother Freedom' videos, muchismas gracias de youtube.com; R.I.P. Ken & Julie Wallis.
i had a hs chum that has left us and would have loved to recoonect with him as u did with yours..but unless we hold on to old chums the river of life and living sweeps them away..I know your pain..but he knows as my friend knows that we think of them as we carry on..be well!
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